Changes

Taoist (and other) schools of thought teach that life is change.  Nature, the seasons, circumstances, our bodies, phases of life, all are changing constantly.

Sometimes, we may experience a change as an ending of something that we once enjoyed, but there is often a new beginning in an ending that we can’t see at the time.  Not all is revealed to us.   This can be delightful, actually embracing that, being willing to dance in the mystery of, the possibility of Life.

Sometimes changes come unexpectedly, other times we seek them out; sometimes a change is unwanted, other times it is desperately sought after.  How do we find balance in all this?

How do we avoid the psychological, emotional suffering that comes with fighting change, resisting what has already changed?  On the flip side, how do we make peace with circumstances, a moment, a change, versus recognizing when our discomfort is truly an inner signal calling for us to use our will power to make a conscious, powerful shift in our lives?

It can be very confusing.  One aspect is to consider, to feel, to experience the discomfort that is arising.  For example, if I feel that I am in a situation that I do not like, can I be with that experience for a time?  Am I avoiding what is, or is there something deeper calling me forward, out of my habits and resistance to the new and uncomfortable?

Another possibly clarifying technique is to consider the situation from various angles – for example, logically and ethically, is this situation that I want (or that I don’t want) causing harm to myself or others?  This may not be obvious.  

For example, is my continual squashing of my creative drive causing me harm?  Actually, yes, it may be.  Is it causing harm to others?  Well, what if my creativity were to bring a piece of beauty to the world?  Is my not following that pull to be more, to do something new, to express myself, possibly denying the world that expression (which may be coming from beyond me)?

Another way is to consider small steps in a general direction.  For example, if you feel a desire to change your career, or if your existing career has changed, or you have changed in a way that it no longer feels like an opportunity for growth, but rather stagnant, should you quit your job?  Well, maybe not without a plan.  

But, if you can move into, lean into, the change you want by feeding it, for example, maybe by taking a class or making an effort to meet someone who you admire working in an area that you desire to move into, you may make room for the change to happen through your willingness.

It’s a balance of effort and letting go, isn’t it?  A dance.